On Monday May 23rd I returned to Alliance after a marvelous weeklong getaway to Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida. Since I’ve already stolen the Larry King blog template, I am swiping the format from an old TV Guide column to gather many topics here. “Cheers” (in case I have to explain this) are for good things. “Jeers” are for bad things.
Cheers to Radio Classics on SXM. You will never never NEVER hear me promote satellite radio. But there is one channel I’m crazy for. Radio Classics is a 24-hour, hosted and curated cavalcade of classic radio theater: drama, comedy, science fiction, western, and more. I listened to about 4 solid hours of it while waiting for my red eye from Denver to take off. One of the shows I heard was an episode of “The CBS Radio Workshop” where they had actors play the criminals and other characters, and all of the police personnel were played by actual NYPD officers and detectives. Absolutely riveting.
Cheers to DIsney’s Pop Century. My second trip to WDW and my second stay at Pop Century. Because I took a red eye flight, I arrived at the hotel at like 6:00am, which was some spectacularly stupid planning on my part. But you know what they offer at Pop Century? Luggage Check-In! So I was able to drop my bags, turn right around and take the first bus to Magic Kingdom. Pop Century has a great gift/snack store, wonderfully cool outdoor decor, and easy access to the parks.
Jeers to getting towards the end of the line for the bus. The bus takes you to Magic Kingdom. If you’re at the end of the line, you are not getting a seat. You are standing and holding a strap. Which, okay, not the worst thing in the world. But at the end of a day of non-stop walking, you really, really, really don’t want to be on your feet any longer.
Cheers to classic attractions that are still alive and well and living in Florida! Disneyland, Walt Disney’s Magic Kingdom in Anaheim, CA, is much smaller than the Florida resort. What this means, for one thing, is that a lot of old-school attractions which were retired at Disneyland to make room for the new, still entertain visitors in Orlando. Classic Audio-Animatronics wonders like “Country Bear Jamboree” and “Carousel Of Progress”; and “People Mover”, a relaxing trip through Tomorrowland.
Jeers To Main Street USA’s Fake Fronts…whenever I go on vacation I always try to bring back a present for my radio brothas Gles and Kalin. This time I kinda bit the big one with Gles but in my defense I thought I had a sure winner on my hands…on Magic Kingdom’s Main Street USA there was a Magic Store. Or so it seemed. In California, there’s a magic store and inside you can be taught how to do tricks, buy different trick set-ups, illusion props, ventriloquist dummies, etc. So when I saw the Magic Store marquee in Florida I thought, “Great! I’ll get Gles a nifty card trick.” But inside it was just a Disney merch store. Basically 75% of the storefronts on Main Street were selling a lot of the same shirts, toys, plush, hats, etc etc. Kinda disappointing.
Cheers to Epcot Center.
I know they just call it “Epcot” now but Epcot Center seems classier to me. Epcot is easily my favorite of all the Florida parks. World Showcase offers a wonderful array of foreign charm from France, Morocco, Mexico, and more. And Future World features interesting and informative pavilions like The Land, The Seas and Journey Into Imagination. As a minor ding…
Jeers to Florida weather. I mean, at least the wind never blew more than 5 or 6 miles an hour. (Suck it Nebraska windmageddon!) But the highs just about everyday were in the mid-90s. The most tragic element of this: In a giant department store in the Japanese pavilion there was a wall–well, here, I’ll show it to you:
Pocky! Soooooooooooooooo much Pocky! And I couldn’t touch it. 3 minutes outside and you’d have a gooey mess. Tragedy!
Cheers to Coke! Everywhere I look is Coke! Including the night my college pal Dan and I got together–there was a Coca-Cola store! I went slightly bonkers and bought three shirts. And some Coca-Cola Tic Tacs, which I have not until just a day or so had the advantage to try. By golly, they taste like Coke!
Cheers to Hollywood Studios. The new Mickey and Minnie ride was fantastic. The Walt Disney “One Man’s Dream” tribute was not new but it was splendid. Muppet-Vision 3D…well, I love seeing this movie in the parks. I’ve seen it many, many times in California and now twice in Orlando. Every time I watch it, you can hear kids and parents laughing at the same things, and having fun together. Walt Disney and Jim Henson were both true visionaries.
Cheers to Tammy and Nicholas! My sister-in-law Tammy and my nephew Nicholas happened to be visiting Walt Disney World around the same time I was! So we got together for breakfast one morning. Nick, I am certain, had an incredible time in Star Wars Land. (Mini-Jeer to me for not getting a picture of us.
Jeers To Bringing Home An Unexpected Souvenir. On the plane back to Denver I got a whalloping migraine headache that just about did me in. I walked to work the next morning but realized that was unwise, so I got a ride home from Gles. It’s your basic cold/sinus deal…being surrounded by 45,000 always-coughing, always-sniffling children probably didn’t help.
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PostScript: After The Trip
Cheers To The Knight Museum For Their Upcoming Exhibit Of My Pez Dispensers!!!!!!!!!!!
I brought over my Pez dispensers, collector tins and other gew gaws to Becci at the Museum, and in a matter of days the Wenty Collection will available to inspire and amuse the young and old! Watch this space…
Jeers To MeTV For Adding The Stupid Useless “A-Team”
Me-TV is fiddling around with their schedule for summer, which is a thing that they do. Some of it looks quite interesting. But then there’s the stupid useless “A-Team.” This moronic 80’s crime drama is taking over the 4:00pm (Mountain time) slot, which is currently held by “The Addams Family” and….start looking for a fainting couch….HAPPY DAYS! Yes, Happy Days is going, as they say, on hiatus. I have no idea if it will come back or not. Sometimes shows that get bumped for summer are right back in the fall…but sometimes it’s a quiet murder.
I mean, if they wanted to replace the 4pm hour with different sitcoms…I’d handle that! Maybe WKRP…or Newhart…or “Dick Van Dyke”, mercy there are so many good ones. Heck, I’d even put up with “Hart To Hart” or “Murder She Wrote.” Put them back-to-back and call it the “People Die Wherever These People Go” Block.
But no. They had to choose the stupid useless “A-Team.”
There’s some past grudge that goes with this, you may infer. When the stupid useless “A-Team” premiered on NBC back in the 80’s, my brother The Wook loved it. I hated it. I wanted to watch sitcoms, or a really lame blooper show called “Foul-Ups, Bleeps and Blunders” co-hosted by Steve Lawrence and Don Rickles.
But my Mom, wise and fair as she was, realized that one hour of television a week was not going to kill me, and it seemed fair to let the Wook watch his stupid useless “A-Team” on the big family TV downstairs. So I spent 3 or 4 years spending Tuesday nights watching bad sitcoms and “Foul-Ups Bleeps and Blunders” on a 13” black and white TV in my parents bedroom.
(Incidentally, my use of the phrase “stupid useless A-Team” should not be interpreted as a critique of my brother, who I love with all my heart. It is just my take on the series in question. But I apparently don’t know much, because there are dozens of shows on television that are hugely popular yet seem stupid and useless to me.